Fuel for the Finish Line: Embracing Failure and Finding Strength with Marathoner Jeff Ramos

Failure. It’s the thing most of us try to avoid at all costs, that looming shadow we see as an end instead of a beginning. But for marathoner Jeff Ramos, failure has become the fuel driving him toward one of the hardest goals in the running world: qualifying for the Boston Marathon. On the latest episode of the Failures Only Podcast, Jeff sat down to share the ups and downs of his journey, from the heartbreak that led him to the starting line, to the countless setbacks that have taught him the power of resilience, discipline, and mental toughness.

Jeff’s story isn’t just for runners; it’s for anyone who’s ever struggled to reach a goal, felt crushed by a setback, or doubted their own ability to keep going. In this episode, we explore the lessons Jeff has learned through failure, the strategies he uses to stay disciplined, and the strength he’s found by embracing the “dark places” that marathon training often takes him.

Let’s dive into the takeaways from Jeff’s journey and see how we can apply his mindset to our own challenges.

The Catalyst: Turning Loss into Motivation

For Jeff, running wasn’t just a fitness pursuit; it was a lifeline during a time of personal loss. Years ago, Jeff was living a typical young adult life, more interested in parties than personal growth. But when he lost his best friend—his dog—who had been a companion through his years of late nights and carefree living, something shifted. As he grieved, he found himself searching for a way to channel that pain into something positive.

In a twist of fate, he entered the lottery for the New York City Marathon and, to his surprise, was selected. That moment set him on a path he hadn’t anticipated, one that would be full of both physical and mental challenges. Jeff wasn’t a seasoned runner, and his first marathon was brutal—physically painful, emotionally draining, and far from the triumphant experience he’d imagined. But he finished. And even though he struggled, he realized that he was hooked. Running became more than a challenge; it became a journey of self-discovery.

Redefining Failure: Seeing Setbacks as Stepping Stones

Jeff’s journey to qualify for the Boston Marathon has been filled with setbacks. He’s missed his target time repeatedly, often by a matter of minutes, and each “failure” could have easily pushed him to give up. But over time, Jeff developed a new way of looking at his setbacks. Instead of seeing each missed goal as proof that he wasn’t good enough, he started to see it as feedback.

Rather than letting self-doubt hold him back, he treated each race as a learning experience. If his pace faltered, he analyzed his training routine to see what needed adjustment. If his mental endurance waned, he worked on his mindset. This approach transformed how he viewed failure—not as an end, but as a critical part of his journey forward. Each setback became a lesson, a tool to refine his strategy, and ultimately, a stepping stone to his next attempt.

For Jeff, failure isn’t a sign that he’s on the wrong path; it’s the path itself. And this shift in perspective has made all the difference, allowing him to stay focused on his long-term goal, even when the immediate outcome isn’t what he hoped for.

The Power of Discipline: Building a Routine that Works

One of the most striking things about Jeff’s journey is the level of discipline he’s cultivated. Running wasn’t always a priority for him. In fact, he admits he barely trained for his first marathon, treating it more as a weekend challenge than a serious pursuit. But as his goal shifted from simply finishing races to achieving a Boston Marathon qualifying time, Jeff knew he needed to take things to the next level.

That meant waking up at 4 a.m. for training runs, dedicating five days a week to running, and often choosing early nights over social gatherings. It also meant adopting a vegan diet, something he initially did out of curiosity but quickly found helped with recovery and stamina. For Jeff, discipline became the anchor that kept him on track, especially on the days when motivation was nowhere to be found. As he puts it, “Motivation gets you started, but discipline keeps you going.”

This disciplined routine gave Jeff something crucial: structure. With each day mapped out, he knew exactly what steps he needed to take to move closer to his goal. And while it required sacrifice, the consistency made his progress measurable and tangible. The daily grind may not be glamorous, but it’s where real growth happens.

Jeff’s dedication to routine serves as a powerful reminder that goals aren’t achieved in a single grand gesture. They’re built one day at a time, through the small, consistent actions that add up over months and years. His story is a testament to the idea that success is often less about raw talent or passion and more about showing up, even when you don’t feel like it.

Facing the “Dark Place”: Pushing Through Mental and Physical Pain

Marathon training isn’t just about physical stamina; it’s a mental endurance test. Jeff describes the “dark place” he enters when he’s pushing his body to its limits—a space filled with self-doubt, pain, and the temptation to quit. For many runners, this is where races are won or lost, and it’s where Jeff has found some of his greatest strengths.

Rather than avoiding the discomfort, Jeff has learned to confront it. When his mind starts to spiral with negative thoughts, he doesn’t fight them. Instead, he focuses on his breathing, his stride, and staying present in each moment. By leaning into the pain instead of shying away from it, he’s developed a resilience that goes beyond running.

In life, we all face our own “dark places,” whether it’s a personal struggle, a work challenge, or a moment of self-doubt. Jeff’s approach to these dark moments teaches us that resilience isn’t about pretending the pain doesn’t exist. It’s about acknowledging it, accepting it, and moving forward anyway. It’s in these difficult moments that we discover what we’re really made of, and Jeff’s journey is proof that pushing through the discomfort can lead to transformation.

The Role of a Strong Support System

Jeff’s journey has been challenging, but he hasn’t been alone. His wife, family, and friends have been a crucial support system, understanding his dietary needs, accommodating his training schedule, and cheering him on even when he’s missed his goals. While resilience is often an individual trait, having a community that believes in your journey can make the setbacks feel a little less lonely.

He’s also found support in unexpected places. During races, seeing runners of all ages and abilities pushing through their own challenges has given him a sense of belonging and motivation. It’s a reminder that he’s part of something bigger—that every runner is out there fighting their own battles, whether it’s a time goal or simply finishing the race. For Jeff, this sense of community has been an invaluable source of strength.

Finding New Motivation: Turning Setbacks into Future Goals

Jeff knows that his journey doesn’t end with the Boston Marathon. While qualifying is his current target, he’s already thinking ahead. He’s talked about tackling a 100-mile ultramarathon, trying his hand at an Ironman, and exploring other endurance sports. For Jeff, the journey of pushing his limits has become a way of life, and the possibilities are endless.

This forward-thinking mindset is another lesson we can take from Jeff’s story. Instead of viewing a single achievement as the end, he sees it as part of a larger narrative. Each goal met becomes a stepping stone to the next, fueling a cycle of growth and discovery. In this way, he’s found a sustainable source of motivation—one that isn’t tied to a single accomplishment but is rooted in a lifelong commitment to self-improvement.

Final Thoughts: Redefining Success Through Resilience and Failure

Jeff Ramos’ story is more than an athlete’s journey; it’s a blueprint for anyone striving to turn their setbacks into strengths. Through personal loss, physical exhaustion, and mental challenges, Jeff has found a way to redefine failure—not as a dead end, but as a sign that he’s on the right path. Each missed goal, each tough run, each early morning wake-up call has contributed to his growth, shaping him into a stronger, more resilient person.

Whether you’re training for a marathon or facing challenges in your own life, Jeff’s story is a reminder that success isn’t always about reaching the finish line on the first try. Sometimes, it’s about showing up, learning from every step, and finding the strength to keep going, no matter how many times you fall short.

So the next time you’re facing a setback, remember Jeff’s journey. Turn failure into fuel, embrace the discomfort, and keep pushing forward. Because as Jeff has shown, every setback is just another step toward the finish line.